• Mister Neon@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    I have quite a bit of sympathy for this man. Never being loved or touched makes for a broken mind. As repugnant it is to say I’m relieved he turned his misery into self hatred rather than anger to those around him. Hopefully he will either find someone or ages out of the desire for romantic companionship thus ending his turmoil.

    • Lowlee Kun@feddit.de
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      8 months ago

      What the fuck are you talking about. Self hate is surely not helpful for anything and definetly not for finding people that like you or turing into a decent person. smh

      • Mister Neon@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        Self hate can go three ways: deterioration, motivation, or repression.

        Deterioration is the worst outcome for the individual. Self hate becomes learned helplessness which can cripple a person’s mental state.

        Motivation is usually the most productive. Using that self hatred as a starting point to address personal issues. The original author stated they were going to the gym on the regular, considering what they wrote I would conjecture self hatred might be the motivation there.

        Repression varies in harm to an individual. You either accept and move on about negative aspects about yourself or you ignore them outright. It’s the bottling up of negativity, not addressing the underlying issues. This is the way some people handle criticism, which can be disastrous for society when powerful people keep adopting this method.

        Now to address your statement about self hatred not being helpful for finding someone or becoming a decent person; not processing negative emotions isn’t healthy and a girlfriend isn’t going to be a magic fix for the author to be happy.

        • Lowlee Kun@feddit.de
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          8 months ago

          Nice long paragraph. First you tell the reader that self hate has three different outcomes without any backup for your presumptuous claims and then you want them to take the rest at faith value too. Thats asking a little bit too much.

          There are many sources for motivation and i would dare claim self hate is not motivating anyone. Overcoming self hate might give you motivation but thats the key aspect. Its like saying being poor or starving are good motivations. No they are not. Getting better is.

          Your whole wall of text sounds like something a mediocre motivation guru would tell people on youtube. If you ask me, you are talking out of your ass, maybe because you overcame your own self hate (which i very much hope).

          If you would tell me you struggle with self hate i would tell you to get help. Professional if you can manage.

          • Mister Neon@lemmy.world
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            8 months ago

            I’m one of the loneliest people in the world. I’ve been this way for decades. Whether or not I understand loneliness I can’t say, but I’ve got plenty of experience in it.

            • curiousaur@reddthat.com
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              8 months ago

              We can tell. Keep it to yourself. Your misery only demonstrates you’re deeply out of touch. It does not give you special wisdom or understanding of how other people operate or feel, no matter how much you like to imagine it.