this is what scares me the most, because I need the money.
Everyone else is right. Try to line something new up first. But I was once in the position of quitting without something lined up, and the decider for me was that if I didn’t quit, I was likely to actually take my own life. It’s a matter of perspective at that point, and clearly, surviving was the better option.
I had a miserably toxic job, and, yeah, I know that pit of despair and what it does to our decisions. I opened the search to the world, but came up with a domestic job about 3000mi away.
I grabbed the go-bag and all but bugged the fuck out, quitting on a Thursday, boarding a plane on a Friday and starting my new job on the Monday. She sold the house, got the movers (fuck moving) and shepherded all our worldlies to the new place. She’s not military but she faked it really well.
When a job is toxic, I send off a job application for someplace else every evening. It makes the job I have bearable cause I feel like I’m already gone but the toxic boss still thinks they have power over me. Gives me a chuckle.
Every time I left a job to find something better, I doubled my salary as well.
If you need the money then start looking for jobs now, and quit when you’ve got something.
This is true.
Look, the moment you know you need a new job, you’re done at the current shop. So get looking.
Answer based on European standard where worker have some basic rights
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Not happy in the job : do the bare minimum while looking for something else guarantees that pay keeps coming, worst-case they fire-you giving you a severance pay (not necessarily big if you’re new in the company) and keeping your right to unemployment (which in general are lost when you quit).
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Toxic environment impacting mental health : Go to your doctor and take sick-leaves, and please do it before being in full burn out, then come back to previous point
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Very toxic environment, like harassment : Talk with a lawyer or an union representative you may have a case to sue the company, and even quit on the spot while keeping severance pay and unemployment rights, but you may-need a legal advise for it
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I just one day said fuck it and gave notice with no plan. I burnt out to the point I was probably getting fired if I stuck around much longer. Besides, If I stayed I was going to quit life instead.
It was a miserable month or 2 of draning my savings finding a new job and I had to take a small pay cut once I did. It was worth it alone for the better work environment.
Line something up if you can, but get out before it gets worse for you.
The requirement for a steady paycheque is what keeps everyone working in terrible conditions. I’m lucky enough that I’ve always had a lot in savings and it has come in handy a few times. Twice I’ve walked off a job and never went back after failing to negotiate proper working conditions with the boss. Both times I burned through about $10,000 in savings while searching for a new job. Almost nobody has that much saved up. If they did, terrible bosses would lose employees on the regular.
Bingo. Low paycheck is not only because of greedy bastard want all the revenue, it’s to keep poor people poor, preventing them from become a competitor. If employees live paycheck to paycheck, wear themselves out everyday, work long hours, and demoralised, they will very likely to stay. It’s learned helplessness.
I’ve left two jobs because they were toxic. I always had something else lined up beforehand though.
I left a few toxic jobs before. At one I left with my middle fingers in the air, throwing chicken nuggets from a bucket at employees I didn’t like on my way out. And then when I saw my fat manager I just went MOOOOOOO on my way out.
20 years later, still worth it. I still laugh.
I feel like everyone deserves at least one job related “fuck you” style moral victory in their lives and that qualifies for sure.
For me it was when the WORST manager I have ever had called me back a year after I quit to ask me to come work for her again and got to laugh in her face and tell her I’d have happily accepted half the pay at her place to scrub toilets as long as it wasn’t working with her, but instead I was making double what she paid me to do my dream job.
I’ve never done cocaine, BUT I’m pretty sure I know what it feels like.
Do the math. See how rational the fear is. Whatever the result, admit you’re afraid and decide if you also want to be brave and act despite the fear. Make a plan. Start working on it. Hopefully things are better on the other side, but either way that fear will pass.
Fear is a natural part of human life. Often useful, but also often not. But as long as you can manage to act despite your fear, it won’t harm you.
Ok, cortisol and stress exist, but you have bigger things to worry about.
Well yeah, that’s why some people stay in toxic jobs unfortunately.
Don’t quit, slowdown, make them fire you, collect unemployment and get a better job
Bad advice for a toxic workplace. That’s just going to ruin your mental health.
I see that in the bad spots, though – people are looking but not landing a new post, so they cope by doing the minimums, peacing out on the dot and getting their sleep. They no longer care about the success of the company, and while that’s admirable, it’s a social issue to abandon the tribe and it can eat on people.
I’m so happy when they land a new post, happier still if I do before I just … stop going. And that’s what I do: I lose interest in going if I can’t find a new post within the year I usually allow (I’m picky).
This last move I told my boss he had a year. It was like 13 months.
Still, if I can drag down the mental health of management with me, that’s a win.
I call it “the fear”. Being unemployed or underemployed or having the risk of no income fills me with it.
This is why I have two jobs. The second one fills with work until every 5 years it seems I abandon the day job and bulk up on the second job to make ends meet and burn its queue down.
It’s not intentional but it works out that way.
No. I haven’t doubled my salary, but I’m on the wrong side of 40 where I’m happy to be employed in this toxically ageist field.
My wife has done super well and sometimes beats my day job pay cheque, so we finally have that buffer too. And she doesn’t quit her jobs as she’s a super team player and instead gets promoted to fix problems. (Kinda got a crush on her for being so awesome)
Always be looking for a new job, you never know when a new boss arrives and makes it horrible.
Yes, I was terrified, but I was also having a mental breakdown. I called my mom sobbing and she was actually the one who told me to quit. I was lucky that she was around because I leaned on her for about two months.
If you can, look for a job, even if it’s gig work, before quitting. I know it sucks, but finding a job will be your new activity. In the mean time, switch to the bare minimum. Take longer breaks, use sick time, etc. Don’t burn any bridges. Spend time making a really nice resume/cover letter. Maybe even see if you can use some work resources before you tell them you’re out.
If you can’t stand it a second longer, I would sit down and see what you have and how long you can last. Finding a job without a residence (in the US anyway) is difficult, so I would not do anything that would leave you homeless. Let people around you know if you have such people. Tell your friends, parents, etc., so they know that you may be needing support. Do not tell anyone from work until you’re ready to go. Make a budget. Make one for if you have literally no money coming in so you can see the worse case scenario and have that be your starting point. You may even want to look around for food banks and so forth, especially churches during this time of year. It may not be everyday, but they do dinners more often in the winter. Write them down or save them somewhere that odes not require internet/service.
Good luck. I wish you you happiness.
Good advice on leaning on food banks. Yes rice and beans suck every meal. Every bowl you eat just think about how temporary this is. You will one day be able to eat aldis toquitos, pizza and chicken nuggies like the good old days.
It scared the shit out of me, but was one of the best decisions I took, on my next job I learned to impose limits from the start.
I managed to find something very soon, but if I were in a similar position nowadays I would first find something new.
Yes but you can get money in many different ways so that’s nice.
