A little while ago, I finally come out as trans to my friends. They’ve been wonderful, supportive, and encouraging. They were honestly the whole reason I finally was able to discover myself, especially my GF. But, and here’s the key, I’m in a very delicate living situation, I’m pretty poor, and I can’t reasonably just leave where I am and live somewhere else, not right now at least. Between the world and my rather transphobic family, I’m kind of stuck. I obviously can’t get more feminine clothing, hair, ANY makeup of any sort, or anything I really want to try. I don’t wanna make this a whole sob story or anything, so basically. Does anybody have some advice to FEEL more like a girl?
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Start a skin care or hair care regimen. Skin care for the face, neck, and décolletage can be done inexpensively, try looking up “oil cleansing” (only requires water, washcloth, and olive oil). Get in the habit of putting on body lotion after you shower - scented lotion is a sneaky way to “wear” perfume, too!
Get your ears pierced, and stick with neutral studs for now.
Start using lip balm, particularly in stick form like Chapstick or Blistex. It will keep the skin of your lips healthy and soft and get you used to applying and wearing lip products.
Groom your nails. Keep them cut neatly with the edges filed smooth. Use lotion, olive oil, or cuticle balm on the skin around the nails. Maintaining your nails now will serve you well if you start using polish or growing them longer in the future, too.
I know how you feel. I was in a similar situation not long ago. The things I started with that I loved was shaving. I never used to shave body hair but it’s mostly all gone now. Smooth legs are so nice and a fresh shave is still a reliable way to help with dysphoria for me.
I was lucky that I worked from home during covid during the early days of my transition, so I was able to grow my hair out, as I used to always keep it short. I know you said a fem hair style is probably not an option right now, but if simply growing it out is, then there is lots you can do in the comfort of your home that is easily undoable for when being around others.
And I 100% agree with everything else here so far too. Therapy has been massively important for my journey, and if that’s an option I highly encourage you to seek someone. I was lucky that where I live there were therapists who specialized in gender.
Also, again if possible, find a queer community! I was pretty stagnanted in my transition for a while, until I found an amazing online queer community. Just being able to talk to others like me and be in a new space where they only knew me as who I really am, and not as my dead name, was immensely helpful.
I believe in you! Congrats on coming out to your friends! 🏳️⚧️💖
