lemmy deleted my completely finished post right before posting so let’s try this again. I find it so annoying that I have to sugarcoat everything. I feel like I’m coddling people. I understand being polite to strangers, but it’s so annoying when my family, who knows I’m autistic, gets upset at my bluntness. I’ve explained multiple times that I’m not trying to be rude and I’m just trying to communicate in a way that works for me, but it doesn’t work. I just don’t understand why I have to say “hey, would you mind not letting the dogs tangle? thank you:)” in some high pitched voice when I could just say, “can you not let the dogs tangle?” in a tone that conveys I’m serious. it’s so much easier when intentions are simply stated.

edit: I’m having trouble posting comments but thank you for all your responses! it’s helping me see things a bit easier, and I definitely have things I can work on now :)

another edit for clarity: my family and I have talked about my communication style. I’ve tried to find ways to meet them in the middle, as I want a compromise. they’ve been unsuccessful but I’m continuing to try. I want to be at a point where it’s not stressful and exhausting to talk to my family. this was more of just a vent post, as I was feeling really annoyed.

  • another stranger @lemmy.worldOP
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    1 year ago

    that’s honestly a really good way to look at it. I guess for me it always feels that someone is pulling the wheel away and not letting me help drive, just saying that i wont help, so when I do get a turn I want to make sure no one misinterprets where I’m going, and there’s no BS on the way. but people also want to actually enjoy the drive. which, I think I can try and do more :) my dad makes it super hard, as he won’t let other people talk and purposely misconstruse our words, so I think that on top of my AuDHD just makes it super hard to know how firm to be lol. but that’s no reason to not work and try and improve 😌