did you get this off of etsy ?

don’t do what johnny don’t does

goofus and gallant reborn for a new age

Honestly I hadn’t thought of him until this post about that tweet.

Talk about a living.

luckily my oven is in radians

but it only make pi

perl is the looney tunes theme song

reincarnation + carcinisation = clickyclackclack

anyone with extensive use of kitchen tongs has a primordial understanding of our clicky-clack fates

Emotional Support Cowboy Outfit.

For when you are too fierce for the chaps there is the F-150.

They’re harder to extinguish than a gas car if they end up catching on fire.

https://www.roadandtrack.com/news/a62188058/tesla-semi-crash-fire-required-50000-gallons-of-water-and-fire-fighting-aircraft/

Yeah that is gonna be a bigger problem than most people imagined.

thank god i’ve been a failure since inception

Xians are so friendly especially the part where they believe that I am going to suffer for eternity in a lake of fire.

Feel the love.

And that is how you end a joke.

you can’t park that there

Meanwhile deaths by the police have increased, again.

google is just gonna slowly fade away like some bad early sci-fi teleporter schtick

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meshes_of_the_Afternoon

The closest thing Ms. Parton ever did to sin was Rhinestone, and that is still one of my favorite movies of all time.

Because if one uses the word “good” sea lions en masse migrate immediately and surround the speaker demanding to change the subject to are ethics real and why the mean tone and is that even a word.

21st century school house rock