Monogamy long predates patriarchal monotheism. Jews didn’t invent marriage. And while there have always been cultures without strict monogamy, there have also always been cultures with strict monogamy - and often these can exist in the same culture. How that makes the voluntary choice to be monogamous universally bad and therefore cheating is universally good I don’t know.
In my family’s fucked up marriages, cheating is almost always the violation that sends the whole thing spinning - no abuse needed. My parents, grandparents, aunt and uncle, in-law grandparents were all destroyed by one side choosing to cheat.