• Hupf@feddit.org
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    2 hours ago

    So long as the robot doesn’t accidentally drop raw chicken on the cylinder

  • schema@lemmy.world
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    4 hours ago

    Just tell the tesla employee that comes with the robot to fake its autonomy to let go.

  • wizardbeard@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    9 hours ago

    Gross misuse of technology.

    We’re just going to ignore that there are open source plans online for motorized multi-axis articulated under-desk fleshlight mounts, and a library of videos with 1:1 motion mapping? Plus it has safety controls to ensure it doesn’t snap the “cylinder”.

    Go green! No need for a whole robot when you’re only looking to use a single part.

    (I mostly just wanted to curse others with knowledge of the robo-vagina. Can’t find the github anymore because a bunch of companies got in on it and dominate the search results now)

  • reev@sh.itjust.works
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    9 hours ago

    “You slipped and fell?”

    “Yes.”

    “Penis first?”

    “Yes, now get me out of here.”

    • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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      4 hours ago

      “I don’t know why patients try to lie. It’s not like it’s a big deal”

      [patient walks in with a butt object]

      “Oh gee, how’d it happen?”

      All they gotta do is not ask. I assume it’s not medically relevant. Dude’s got a cucumber in his butt, everybody knows how it happened. What’s the point in asking?

      • Entropywins@lemmy.world
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        2 hours ago

        You’ve obviously not had the same sorts of completely innocent accidents I’ve had throughout my life.

      • Zorque@lemmy.world
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        4 hours ago

        People have been getting their penis stuck in things for as long as there have been holes.

        • themeatbridge@lemmy.world
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          4 hours ago

          When I was in high school, my biology class did a stream study, and the class funny guy was documenting it with a big vhs camcorder. I was standing next to him when he saw a broken drain pipe sticking out of a wall. He pointed the camera at the pipe, and called to me. “Hey, themeatbridge. See that hole? Don’t stick your dick in that hole.”

          I laughed, because it was funny, and the class also thought it was funny when we watched it later. So funny that it became the thing everyone said to me for about 6 months. “Hey, themeatbridge, see that outlet?” “Hey, the meatbridge, see that taco?” You get the idea. I became known as the guy who has to be told not to stick his dick in things.

          It was almost 30 years ago, and I still have ptsd from it.

    • werefreeatlast@lemmy.world
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      8 hours ago

      I also agree! I just want to clarify that I knew it was his penis before actually reading this comment because I’m smart too.

  • Jake Farm@sopuli.xyz
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    11 hours ago

    This is the second post I have seen where someone has their cylinder stuck in something is this a meme now?

  • Baggins@feddit.uk
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    11 hours ago

    First we had the wankpanzer, now we have the wankrobot.

    PS. I would also have accepted wankautomaton, wankpuppet, wankmechanic or wankandroid.