- cross-posted to:
- theonion@midwest.social
- MapleResistance@lemmy.ca
- cross-posted to:
- theonion@midwest.social
- MapleResistance@lemmy.ca
You must log in or # to comment.
-
This is basically the Canadian version of The Onion.
-
The joke is that trump might kidnap him too
Trump just annexed Venezuela after threatening them.
Trump has also threatened Greenland, Canada, and Mexico. Are you sure it’s a joke?
Headline:
Mark Carney turns off geolocation on phone just in case
The implied joke is that the reason is trump might kidnap him too, because it is plausible.
What exactly don’t you understand about how it’s a joke?
Are you sure you just don’t know what a joke is?
If I make a joke about trump having a tiny mushroom dick, would you say it can’t be a joke because it’s true?
Like, what the actual fuck are you even trying to say here, and why are people up voting it?
The website is literally a parody website, every single article is a joke. If you think differently, you just bit the beaver.
Beaverton/Onion comments are always full of people making jokes about “are you sure this is satire?”. Relax. Take a breath. Sure givesomefucks but maybe give a few less fucks when it comes to dumb comments on a Beaverton article.
Which is it?
Not a joke? Or it’s a joke and I should care less?
If it’s a joke and I should care less, why were you saying it’s not a joke?
Was it literally just because you see other people make the comment and get up voted, so you made the comment without understanding anything?
You know that’s literally how chat it’s 30 years ago behaved, that’s the level you’re on chief.
So maybe you should start giving more fucks and not just blindly repeating nonsense you’ve seen people get up votes for.
I wish Americans got this fired up about their government. We might not be having this discussion in the first place.
Removed by mod
Jesus christ, you are way too worked up over…nothing.
Chill out.
You are getting very cross indeed over a joke.
It is a joke, and it’s funny because it holds a kernel of truth. “We laugh so we do not cry.”
No tears shed for Maduro, but it’s pretty obvious that Trump doesn’t know what he’s doing and doesn’t have a plan.
Staging a secret service raid to kidnap Carney is pretty out there, but then El Presidente Trump just talked about “doing something about Mexico” from the Southern Presidential Palace.
It’s a joke, you should laugh, and you should also remember what the joke is referencing.
Bit the beaver eh?
Some people don’t understand that comedy is rooted in tragedy. It makes light of the tragic as an outlet. So no, givesomefucks, some people do not know what a joke is.
“Joke”
deleted by creator
-
Mark Carney: and that’s why I had graphene os Installed on every phone in the family.
It’s funny because a fascist regime just blitzkrieged South America.
Real hilarious stuff.
Finally posted a response. Weak.
Is it so hard to copy and paste the text?
By all means, feel free to do so.
I can’t. Because its an image of text.
Ha, the joke is that you can’t turn off geolocation! That is why it is funny! Ha ha!
ohhhh now i get it
To turn off your phone’s geolocation, turn off your phone.
Even if you turn off your phone, there is a lower-level operating system that is still connecting to cell phone towers. You either have to take the battery out, or leave your phone at home.
Try doing a search for “baseband processor”.
RF-blocking bags can also solve this problem.
Not… exactly.
Baseband processors could hypothetically remain energized and pull a list of nearby base stations, but it’s not possible for it to be transmitting without you knowing (the battery drain would be extremely obvious). I have also never heard of this happening, nor can I find an example of this being documented behavior, nor can I find an example of someone enabling this functionality while the device has been powered off.
What can happen is something like the subversion of the power-off state to be simply an implementation of the OS’s standby state - this is extremely difficult in any modern mobile OS (again I can’t find examples of this being demonstrated without arbitrary code execution) but is the method rumored to be employed by the various security groups.
If you’re being targeted by a group on the level of (ex:) the mossad, having a phone at all is a liability, even if the battery has been removed. If you’re not the target of a security group, turning off your phone is a great way of preserving your privacy.
(Also, fun little side note, depending on your region leaving your phone at home won’t do anything to prevent your location be tracked. Whee!)
Phone seems too risky, let’s switch to pagers instead, what could possibly go wrong?
You can put it in a faraday cage
Removed by mod
Can any phones operate in starlink only mode? Would that offer any protection or would SpaceX just give the data to whoever asked?
Given Musk’s hard right turn, I’m not sure I’d trust Starlink with much.
Well if you ask me, I only use Chrome on my iPhone connected to Starlink to order from Amazon with my credit card, I’m basically a ghost.
The Beaverton really needs to stick to satire, it was never meant as an advice column.
Removed by mod
I think you missed something 😬
Removed by mod
The Beaverton is a satire site
Removed by mod
Thats so much worse…
Removed by mod
Except that the things you’re blaming him for are things that David Cameron and his government cheerfully did, not Mark Carney.
He kept the stock market from crashing quite as badly when he was in charge of the UK’s independent central bank, so you cam argue that he protected the rich, but that’s exactly what he was paid to do. It was the conservative government, that took all the money away from the people, not Mark Carney.
It’s ok to be wrong sometimes.
Removed by mod
It is the Beaverton, it is satire.
As independent governor of the Bank of England he had power to chair the decision making board over interest rates and to do quantitative easing.
The impoverishment of the poor and removal of support was the policy of the (separate) Tory and libdem coalition government up to 2015 and Tory government from 2015.
